Posted Sep 7, 2009 in Travel | 0 Comments

SKYWHORES UNITE!!! Lazy in the Dominican

mass Rapid Transit

Where do I begin? Being of Haitian decent it’s been a wonder and embarrassment of mine never having visited my parents country of origin. The closest I’ve been to Haiti is the taxi stand.

Considering the political climate I figured that I could at least get a feeling of the climate and vegetation since both countries are on the same island. I tried visiting but in vain since my cousin was shot. I asked her if she called the police and she mumbled that it was the police that shot her trying to rob her. Needless to say Haiti was out of the question for me.

I’ve heard stories of poverty, prostitution and crime and prepared myself for such.


1st Rule: always listen to others but be wary, not ignorant.

Of course I’ve heard of the beaches with fine sand and the hundreds of all-inclusive resorts. However, by taking a chance you can discover a whole lot more. You never know what lurks at the end of a dark alley. I’ve discovered amazing nightclubs and restaurants and thankfully have never gotten raped … L

Its unfortunate that people prefer to just sleep, drink, and party when on vacation. There’s so much out there to learn; yet many do not. Recently on a trip to Dominican Republic, I found all of this.

An amazing sight to see with a grand tropical lobby fit for film. This resort has lovely rooms leaning towards basic luxury. Services include the regular and include bike riding, horseback riding and much needed kids club with beach party on Friday nights. I enjoyed my stay and would have liked to stay longer.

We then visited Almuerzo Luperon Hotel. This is an activities resort, boasting non-motorized water sports, horseback riding, banana boat and varied team sports.

The décor may not have been as nice as the last resort but in my opinion what it lacked, it made up for in activities and proximity. Proximity to what? La Parque Nacionale La Isabela in the province of Luperon. This national park was the actual 1st point of landing for Christopher Columbus where he probably raped the locals and pillaged the villages of the island for the sake of Christ!!! Did I say that outloud?? Damn this gay tourettes.

The view is inexplicable and thankfully protected from commercialism by the government. A definite must see with a loved one.

There is more about this area and trip then I can actually mention. This will have to wait for the next issue where I can get into more personal detail. Trust me it gets nitty and gritty.

If you’re in Puerto Plata, I encourage you to take a 2-day trip to Santo Domingo, though you’ll wish to stay longer. All it takes is a 3-hour car ride through Santiago. If passing through Santiago stop for 30 minutes and learn how Dominican cigars are hand made at the E. Leon Jimenez plant or visit the Brugal Rum Distillery. The same family creating a form of Molson or Bronfman legacy owns both. Who knows maybe they were doing stuff illegally too just like our famed families.

I’ll reveal my Santo Domingo venture in the next issue. This city truly deserves exposure.

DR has 3 coasts the south dominated by Santo Domingo, the east Punta Cana, and the north Puerto Plata. However, it would be a big mistake to ignore the tiny village of Sosua.


I was told that I would be extremely disappointed with the quality of beach, abundance of mosquitoes, and the pollution. HOW WRONG THAT PERSON WAS!!! Maybe that was then, but this is now. Strikingly beautiful scenery (day/night), lush lanscape and bustling nightlife. If you’re looking for peace or excitement it’s to be had in this town, whatever your tastes are. To top it off, Dominican men are hot and the women hotter!

The Azzuro Hotel is the perfect location if you’re looking for nocturnal activity. On the edge of the Cavarette nightlife, your just walking distance to any bar of choice. The nightlife could surpass that of certain cities. About a dozen bars play different music for all tastes with their respective dance-floors leaking unto the sand. It’s hard not to satisfy your interest whether its food, drink, music, or person. Definite must!

If you’re searching for absolute luxury with a view to kill, then the Sosua Bay Hotel (sister of Azzuro) will not disappoint. Wide variety of food, posh rooms, with romantic settings, and an elevated view of Sosua Bay that will move you to take long peaceful walks.

All in all, the Dominican Republic is what you make it, whether it’s for your family, your friends, your boy/girlfriend or ho. If you go with an open mind, heart, and wallet you’ll have the time of your life.


The friendliest of people, the beauty of their culture, the passion in their dance results in a terrific vacation.

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