Posted Aug 8, 2010 in Travel | 1 Comment

LOVE IS IN THE AIR: Tales of the Mile High Club

Does a secret society exist where strangers, newlyweds, or friends can exchange in sexual favors 30,000 ft in the air? Is there a membership drive? Perhaps a gold, silver, or platinum card as proof? As a flight attendant (fa), I first joined the friendly skies as an innocent little boy, all starry eyed, with the hopes of seeing the world. I was all dapper with my uniform and freshly pressed shirt. I boarded my first aircraft with a smile and warm heart and introduced myself to the experienced fa’s. These ladies have been flying as long as I’ve been alive. They’ve seen the world time and time again (it showed on their faces) and were once the stereotypical image of professionalism in the air.

My purser walked over to me and with a smile looked over to her friend while grabbing my ass and bellowed,” Harriet, we got a young buck here!”. This would set the pace for the rest of my career.

Toronto-Tel Aviv

After serving the meals, clearing the trash and insisting that people not sleep on the floor or pray in the galleys, I noticed a man enter the back lavatory, nothing suspicious. I go about my business. A minute later a woman enters the same lavatory. I assume that it’s unoccupied and again go about my business. However, after about 20 minutes, things got a little suspicious. I go to knock on the door and my co-worker stops me and begins to sing, ”When I get that feeling, I need sexual healing.” She grabs my hands and proceeds to dance with me singing. The couple came out red faced and we of course did what any crew would do, we applauded them, popped open a bottle of bubbly and poured them two glasses. Newlyweds. “Why stop love?” said my purser.

Vancouver-Toronto

An fa’s nightmare flight is usually a red-eye, meaning you leave late night and arrive early morning. We have to stay awake throughout the entire flight while watching 200+ passengers sleep and snore. We are human after all and our bodies control us we don’t control our bodies. Do I sound bitter? So as I tried to fight off sleep due to my 4 days of previous 6am departures then thrown onto an 11pm (no, I’m not bitter), I noticed an older Chinese couple (in their late 40’s) were pretty much the only two passengers awake. I assumed they connected from Beijing or Shanghai and called it a day. To keep myself awake I poured them two glasses of water and offered it to them. They were completely wrapped in blankets. I offered the drink and the man motioned with his head no. I found it odd until I noticed a hand moving under the blanket consistently.

It wasn’t my business and went back to my seat. After a minute the lady disappeared under ‘his’ blanket as everyone slept around them. I nudged my purser who just smiled at me and returned to his magazine. Disappointedly after a minute, a few shuffles and glances the woman rose and walked straight to the washroom. On exiting she dared not look us in the eye as we offered her a drink. At least he slept quite well after that.

Toronto-Delhi

Known as the flight from hell, not because of the passengers as they were incredibly sweet, but due to the length of time. 19hours on the plane is no pleasure trip for passengers so you can imagine fa’s. About 10 hours into the flight everyone was sleeping, we were preparing for the next service when I noticed from the middle galley looking back, a dark figure rising. Finding it odd, I decided to investigate. A few aisles away I noticed a very attractive lady mounted on a man with her back completely covered with blankets. In absolute shock and still being the innocent newbie I called my purser and expressed my outrage. The pursor from afar observed the entire ordeal and contemplated on his actions. This contemplation took way too long in my opinion as he only approached them when she dismounted.
Her dismount was perfect.

Words were exchanged and he then went to the back galley. He returned with two glasses of wine, handed them over and walked over to me and whispered, ” Why stop love?” You may ask if there’s a club, a secret handshake, or protocol to follow? I would say no. I have never seen or heard discussions of people organizing a mass movement of aerial sex and I don’t believe an organized club exists, I do believe there is a small number of people who have experienced the joy’s and risks of intimate encounters, in a closed space during their travels. Will they share that information, maybe?
We as flight attendants don’t promote it but we do respect this group’s unofficial motto,

” Why stop love?”

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

Be Heard