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Posted Sep 25, 2011 in Cool Shit | 1 Comment

Just for Jokes (Part IV)

In RO, we laugh at death – that’s when we’re not crying or singing about it. And what better way to laugh at death than a story about two drunken ladies and diarrhea? (Or is that diarrhoea, hmmm….)

Anyway, before I give it all away, here’s the story:

Two married ladies decide to go out one night and to leave their husbands at home – a nice girls’ night out, no men, no stress. So they go to a rather infamous bodega to get drunk and eat like ravenous little sows. They order a bunch of mici and a bottle of wine, they work their way through that, then more mici and more wine, and so on and so on.

At some point, they realize it’s three in the morning and they can’t get home anymore. They spent all their money on wine and mici, so now they have to walk home. So they start walking. And they walk, and walk and walk. As they make their way back to their roost, one of them gets struck with some serious gut pain.

“Damn, there must have been something in those mici,” she says.

“You gonna be okay?” asks her friend. [I have taken the liberty to redact some of the things said here, because women have the most disgusting conversations sometimes!].

With not a portaloo in sight and everything closed for the night, they decide to sneak into a cemetery. When they find a suitable spot, the lady with the problem asks her companion:

“Do you have some tissues or something? Cuz I don’t know what to wipe with.”

“Well, just take off your panties and use them. We’ll throw them after.”

“But it’s summer, and I’m not wearing panties!”

“Oh God, neither am I!”

Eventually, the enterprising women find a way. The next day, the two husbands are on the phone:

“Gogule, you’re not gonna believe what happened to me. My wife came home at four in the morning, piss drunk and with no panties on!”

“Dorele dawg, that’s nothing. My wife came home at four in the morning, piss drunk, with no panties on and with a ribbon hanging from her ass that said We’ll always remember you – The Brothers Dumitru.”

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  1. I love how you kept the joke authentic by not changing the names of “mici, Gogu, Dorel, etc.”. Even though it was translated, it definitely brought about the Romanian joke-telling ways. Gotta love our language (I.G. – initially from Bucharest, RO as well)

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