Posted Sep 19, 2009 in All Things Sex | 1 Comment

I don’t know if I could…sex it up sober that is.

Druken Sex

It was the last of the lazy summer days.

Good friends enjoying the sun, gazing at the smoldering skater-boys and appreciating the sweet sistahs struttin’ their stuff in spaghetti string summer dresses.

Luca eyes darted everywhere, getting sexcited with the new crop hitting the city for the new school year.

“Didn’t you graduate like 6 years ago?” I chided.

“You’re not old news if they’re new…” His remark was dry, yet honest.

So of course our conversation turned to sex…

“So James?”

He left early last night before the guest DJ even got on.

“He was cuuute.” Nina cooed.

“Didn’t think he was your type…” Luca wondered.

James actually paused before he answered.

“Yeah…It was okay…”

“Why’d you pause?” Nina challenged.

“Well, I…um…I – oh this is embarrassing!!!”

“Why?” I cut him off. “C’mon! No filters!”

“I like being touched okay?! He could’ve…touched me more…” James face flushed.

“Why didn’t he?” as ever, Nina was blunt.

“’Cause we were mashed?”

“Why didn’t you just tell him what you liked?”

“Do this? Do that? Bitch much?”

Nina smirked. “Ergo sits the guy who’s frustrated.”

Drunken Sex

Whoa. Something was wrong here.

It’s already common convention that men don’t really talk.

But two in a room? The silence could be deafening.

Bad enough that some need an excuse (pick your favorite intoxicant) to have sex, but we can’t even discuss the kind of loving we want? Then it dawned on me.

I Love Drunk Sex

How many people out there are having good consistent sober sex?

“I’m usually drunk.” Nina said.

“I’m usually high.” Luca snapping back from some young distraction.

“You’re paying attention?” I muttered.

“I can multitask.”

“I don’t know if I could – sex it up sober – that is.”

“I don’t even know if I have.”

“Honestly? If I was sober, I probably wouldn’t have sleep with 2/3 of the guys I have.” Luca laughed.

James eyebrow arched.

“What? I still need to get laid, bro.”

“I’m sure couples are –“

“Don’t believe the hype.”

“Okay – but if any one should, shouldn’t it be-“

“Sometimes having someone magnifies your issues.”

“Isn’t half the fun, figuring out what the other person likes?” I asked.

Suddenly I got stared down by the crew.

“Who the hell has time for that?!”

“Wham! Bam! Thank you Sam!”

“Or Pam…”

“Thanks Luca.”

“Got your back sister.” he smiled at Nina. “People, at the end of the day, sometimes it’s just about getting off.”

Drunk-Sex

So yeah…how many people out there are having good consistent sober sex?

Holla at your M.A.T.

akaMAT@yourKloset.com


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  1. we love our MAT. and who doesn’t heart drunk sex??

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